-I can eat a pound of ham
-Don't clean the hotel's iron with a knife
-Don't try to hug the crazy homeless black man
-George Barris will let you pick him up and hold him like a baby (his handler will not)
-The Hotel's bar does not allow nudity
-Bug zappers made into tazers hurt like a motherfucker
-$6 bullhorns are the best bargain on the planet
-More strangers than you think will let you hug them for five seconds (some will even show you their fat, ugly boobs)
-A chopper can get rear-ended by a car, throw the rider over the handlebars, and come away virtually unscathed
-You can rent roller skates for $1 at the Santa Maria fairgrounds
-My friends rule
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